he quoted Bring It On. It's over.
I'm pretty sure there is a country song about this exact situation
masturbating is 5million times harder to finish knowing grandma is in the guestroom downstairs. just so you know.
so i wake up and the chick who i had sex last night left her phone number. next to the number was a broken condom. should i call?
It was so delicious I was introducing it to people. Guy from my psych class was like "This is my girlfriend, Erica," and I was like, "This is my milkshake, Oreo."
I just got a facebook invite to join a group called "bring back the old franzia spout." i never want our generation to grow up.
Nope. Too hot. We just sat in my tub with cold water spraying on us drinking coronas. This summer heat is killing my libido slowly
I'm about 95% it's a collapsed lung. Go big right?
If I'm going to risk life and limb to wear a Wings jersey to the Garden next week, the least they can do is win.
And the most would be ending up in bed with one of them.
Welp, I just herniated a vocal cord during sex. How was your night?
Need a Dr's note to excuse me from blowjobs for 3-6 weeks while my jaw heals..
How did I end up with the cock ring?!
I have to close one eye, because I don't wanna see two movies, I only want to see one.
I will bring Jesus to court if he punishes me for that
He's a downgrade and it was quick. But it was dick nonetheless.
Randomize
