I'm glad girls dont get visible erections
But, it would have made life so much easier...
we have a love-hate relationship...we love having sex but hate waking up next to eachother
Gross thing of the day...i got cum in my new boots
conquered wheelchair sex. it's rather convenient. you'd think it was made for it, with all those handles and adjustable features.
Your tequila is gone. I suggest you bring more home before you go out for dinner. Money is taped to mailbox.
Help. Me. He just whispered 'prepare yourself', & sprayed hairspray everywheres to make sure the 'air was crisp'
I was high fiving everyone. I even high fived with the wall for doing such a good job suporting the ceiling and keeping us alive.
My first drink last night was a 2-liter of jameson and coke. So hung over it hurt to put my pants back on
I just found a video of you asking to be a whale with me.
Is the party worth it?
I am drink. Beer pony and singing.
I thought I was pretty much sober now but then I realized I've been eating scrambled eggs with my hands...
Why does my therapist keep calling when I jerk off?
It's 3 am and I'm buying cat food and batteries for my vibrator. Good thing I shaved my legs for this.
Nice classy night out before we roll our faces off
I might be a bit longer... I found a hot guy at the grocery store, so I'm following him and buying stuff that he's buying
Randomize
