Where is the hickey?
ppl dont tell me stories about anal. apparently im not a tell-me-stories-about-anal kind of person
i have a dinosaur tramp stamp
btw, i had a dream i drank 260-proof vodka last night. thank god that doesn't exist in real life.
29 People Confess The Worst Example Of Dirty Talk They’ve Ever Heard
He passed out on the patio with nothing on but his boxers. So we put our beer caps on him. Yeah he woke up with a polka dot sunburn.
I was on hold waiting for customer service at verizon so we obviously we had enough time to have sex, i just put the phone on speaker
I'm the only adult here not drinking and their 2 year old daughter is trying to play dolls with me.. I've never been so demoralized in my life.
It Amazes me that I was able to drunk update my status in Spanish last night.
He wasn't lying when he said he was immune to pepperspray. He pretended it burned for like 12 seconds and told the cops he was kidding he was alright. We'll be there soon.
21 Women Compare Anal and Vaginal Sex
So we just left her at the hospital. She is not ruining my Monday night
Watching her eat just hurts me
Please come and rip my uterus out before it does it itself
There's no good way to say, "sorry your son saw me naked on top of your brother"
I fucked him twice and then he set me up with his teammate. This kid does wonders for me
So changing channels while she's on top is frowned upon. It's back to thinking about baseball again.