? is bags or t-bags slang for scrotum?
jesus mom
Brickbreaker makes my post drinking poops that much better. Sorry, I had to tell someone who might agree.
so I told him I hadn't been laid since Bush was president. Right after he cums, he says "Welcome to the Obama Administration".
Tonight's Jeopardy categories were "Star Trek, Action Figures, Dinner For One, In Need of a Date, Still Living With Mom & Dad, You Have No Life." Beginning to think my life is the Truman Show.
Just saw an old lady vomit in a trash can at the airport. I instinctively called her a pussy. College has ruined us.
And he tried to make it as casual as possible by asking where i was going on vacation while he was poundin me.
All I kmoe is rheres a coffee pot full pf vodka in my purse
I woke up at 3am, my head in a toilet, still at the kegger, wearing a random cowboy hat.
I misunderstood what a furry was. Come pick me up.
Jasmine is diving into bushes again.
The guys are trying to figure out my orientation....think theyve settled on "drunksexual"
2016 is coming through for me, I'm renaming it the year of great dick
Tinder recommend to a friend: making threesomes easier since 2016
I made the antidote to the nasty cognac. I AM THE GOD OF MIXED DRINKS.
the person she was housesitting for had a christmas card from charlie sheen on the fridge so we fucked on the couch and just slept in the bed
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