I've come to the conclusion that if I was an old man, I would perve around in short gym shorts for kicks.
how soon is too soon after the break-up to ask for my condoms back?
Found a phone last night. Hope "daddy" gets picture messages
i think it was just a coincidence but she literally vomited the second she saw my penis.
I have teeth marks. Like distinct upper and lower jaw.
Yeah me too. My shoulder looks rabid.
nothing says roomie bonding better than a sunday shroom trip.
All I remember is waking up with 3 penises pointed at my face. I also remember enjoying that a lot. And then I threw up in their shower.
Come my child we shall walk thru the pasture of amazing sex and corndogs. Hint:some corndogs are not corndogs.
It's embarrassing enough people in my life are aware of the ridiculous things that happen to me. I don't think we need to get the whole world involved.
I remember saying your puke looked like a jellyfish and you got very offended.
That girl definitely just ate a hot dog and stared straight in to my eyes.
Well the good news is ill probably have my new boobs by the time he sees me naked
When God made him he put all his talent in his dick. What he lacks in brain, he makes up for in loin.
Sorry about the confusion with the nudes last night that was rude
Hitting up all my dealers for my birthday grams is paying off
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