I think the taxi driver just requested me on facebook..... his name was george right?
He told me I had nice tits + they have a great shape. + then proceeded to flatten my boob + show me what the gross tits he's seen look like.
you wouldn't believe how quickly birth control dissolves in vodka
thanks for at least making it out of the pool before you threw up
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
uhh when the x-ray tec was moving your head you licked his hand and meowed.. i think he knew you weren't sober
There are too many people and smells in this elevator for my hangover to handle.
My cab driver just started a conversation with "Three years ago I pleaded guilty..." Check on me later tonight please.
Running across campus through Hurricane Sandy while hammered and in a slutty cowgirl costume obviously should be top priority tonight
Question. Was fucking Laura an entirely regrettable decision?
like...quickly.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I feel as if I need Plan B just being in the same room as them for more than 5 minutes.
Today is a shit your pants at work kinda day
I'll take "things you shouldn't say to a guy you just met in a bar" for 100!
My penis has like 3 people bidding on it
I wiped my ass with a McDonalds wrapper. I've hit an all time low. Sorry for my impatience
Legal advice please. Can you sue someone for jerking off to photos of you?
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