You're my little dorito
By the way the fattest man alive got married yesterday and I don't even have a boyfriend.
I don't really want to write this paper. It's the last one of the semester - I need to savor the feeling of procrastination.
So there's 10 guys in this picture..I've made out with 5 of them. does this make me a slut?
eh 50% isn't bad..i'd say 80% is slut material.
Dude. I'm busy doing PR for America. FOR AMERICA. Europeans think we can't handle liquor.
When I realised he had a girlfriend I just started telling them about my ex and how I write poetry about him. Which I then read to them. They just gave me pity looks and left me to finish my spliff alone.
i sucked his cock and got snuggles in return. I'm the mother Theresa of giving in a relationship.
I'm just gonna start letting dudes eat it. American idol for my vagina
I wonder how he feels knowing that he's the one who turned me gay
Yeah she let me pull the goalie and wear my USA flag like a cape since it was the first day of the world cup
if it wasn’t 100% before, it is now that i will most definitely die a quesadilla related death
Did we actually play with swords last night or did I dream that?
my gyno just used the expression "dick around." too far?
I gave him breakup sex, AGAIN
I can still taste your cum in my mouth and my in-laws are coming over. This should go well.
Randomize
