I dreamt Michael Jackson dropped his pants in front of me and I had to ignore it.
would you object to me following you around all the time with a video camera and selling it to TV? Your life could make me millions.
Well at one point you put icyhot on your feet because you lost your shoes and it was snowing outside.
Just pure bliss will emerge from Charles, my tranny bong.
He's only going to be gone for two weeks
That's two months in gay whore years.
Also, if someone could cut me off before im rolling around the yard pantsless with a 40 year old lesbian that would be awesome.
Drinking Hot Toddies on the Porch and blasting bob dylans "hurricane" bring it on sandy!
I feel like you guys are talking about real things and have real problems and I'm just over here like 'should I take muscle relaxers or get drunk tonight?'
It's like, "you literally have no idea who i am but i definitely slept with your brother in your bed."
Thanks for getting me stoned. My manager started quizzing me about the menu and I struggled until he asked me to describe the tortilla soup. I said "tasty"
Well you finally jumped into that tree you've always wanted into and some girl gave you an 8.5. You were very happy.
She's like a solid nine. Well maybe not a tomorrow morning nine, but she's a nine right now and trying to take me home.
We were all having a bath, the three of us, then that drug dealer guy walked in and peed. Sitting down. Apparently he didn't want to offend us.
just saw those girls we met the other night. i happen to be wearing a bunny suit and driving your smart car. i think its safe to say thats a no go situation.
also, i'm not sure if i'm proud to say this but our regional manager's hot fiance was grinding on me at the reception while he stood and watched.
i suppose that explains why he told me he plans on promoting you this Friday.
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