READY
for what?
TO HAVE SEXXXX
i think you have the wrong number
Having kids is risky. They might end up weird.
Why are there hot girls at the dollar store?
The recession has changed everything man.
Her throat is strong enough to gargle peanut butter. I'm sure you were satisfied.
I wanna get shitfaced and yell about Tim tebow
i cant wait to be back in my element of drunk, on a barstool, ive missed home
I hope you get some kind or rare disease that makes your dick ties itself in a knot for fucking her you lucky bastard.
Nothing like coaching 5 year olds with a bunch of visible bruises from last night's drunk bondage sex.
Using all my books as packing buffer for my liquor bottles. And you said being an English major was worthless.
Got drunk with him at an Irish pub ended up losing him for twenty minutes when I finally find him his piss drunk singing Irish folk music with a group of Irish guys and a midget
He meets the coolest people when he's drunk
Seriously though, passing out on the police station floor must have been priceless!
You had me at "let me see your balls"
I'm thankful I didn't get drunk and shit my pants this year. 🦃
No I don't. You owe me sex and cinnamon rolls.
i want to say his dick was in it but not his heart
Randomize
