We're 3 acts into this drag show and we've already run out of Lady Gaga songs.
i would totally change schools right now just to be that new girl everyone wants
I just smoked my last bit of kief with a grill lighter. This is what crackheads must feel like.
Do you think it'd be inappropriate to have an I'm Not Keeping My Baby Party the day after her baby shower?
Just reduced mom to tears when she realized I wasn't kidding about hating kids. She's crying about never being a gma. Now would be the time to tell her about the girl you knocked up. You're welcome.
Im cutting you off tonight ONE boy at a time
Bro. Some kids just drive-by judged the shit outta me.
It was right before we played jenga with champagne glasses for a good half hour
Lmfao I'm not trying to have a pissing contest over acid with my mom.....
I immediately knew he was tripping, he came over with a grocery bag of snow balls and a bike helmet on and asked if I was prepared to die for my country.
I tried to pay my tab and go home but she wrote me a "list of things I'm good at" with fellatio as no 1...
I fucked my ex boyfriend to get shrooms for you guys
That's the sweetest thing I've ever heard
My dad just saw me take dirty one night stand underwear out of my purse. I'm willing to admit I have a problem
Damn it. If you ever throw me again, take video.
doc says my ankle might be broken, they're going to do xrays. He asked me what happened and I told him if he could find out that would be great.
Randomize
