Considering the face that your still in jail Im gunna go with no.
Last night, you attempted to motor boat my vagina then proceeded to blow raspberries on it. Don't ever do that again.
everything was going good until you started showing off the pictures of poop you took with your phone
can't wait for January to be Over so I don't have to see all the fat resolutionists working out.
Just dropped $150 at the liquor store. No power and two feet of snow has taken my alcoholism to another level.
Your scrotum should have touched every square inch of that place by now. Start with the water fountain.
I sat on his lap and we shared a beer. I feel like that's an invitation to his dick.
it's like I can see my whorish nature reflected back at me in his wedding ring.
Also, just woke up in a Romney tank and sequin flag panties. Merica.
Gross! What the hell is that?!?
It's quite clearly a man posing erotically with multiple packages of bacon.
I haven't been that free with the boobs since I was 19. I'm putting them away for a while.
If you insist
The one guy literally flopped my boob out. Yes I insist.
All I want to do is ice my pussy, but then my husband would probably infer that I was not at a business meeting last night.
And I had on a penis ring on the whole time at dinner. And I ate veal...
But Keith is doing MDMA for New Years and he's 39.
Keith has a beautiful 20 year old girlfriend, a good job and a cute puppy. We can't all be Keith.
But I want to be Keith.
You got drunk, made toast, and declared yourself a domestic goddess.
Randomize