this other lifeguard and I are actually considering paying a kid to shit in the pool
My roomate just said the he would "tap dat" to the 13 out of control girl on maury. Im finding a new place in the morning.
you told me your penis was albino and it couldnt be exposed to light so you needed to keep it in me
I mean, she is a dancer for the Suns. If I didnt fuck her that would just be bad team spirit.
Real housewives of new joisy starts MONDAY. Skype session after? Virtual slap the bag?
But when he came on my stomach I noticed how tan I was!
What's the protocol on showing a video of me sucking the life out of my ex in order to prove beyond a doubt that I give great head???
You dislocated his arm and then bought him two shots to numb the pain while you pushed it back in
The guy I met last night said we had a real connection and gave me his AA coin because he met me during his relapse
just filed my taxes drunk as balls. i may be going to jail.
I think if I set up a series of baby gates up the stairs each one more difficult to undo then the last that should be able to stop your drunk vagina.
And after that you guys started calling arbor mist "breakfast juice"
I've seen too many dicks in the past week. I can't do it anymore.
Waking up next to a guy you don't remember going home with and the first thing you say is: where is my tiara? = successful birthday
I may have been bent over an elementary school lunch table a few weeks ago. Don't judge.
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