I think youre just another guy trying to take advantage of a young naive innocent girl
you're not innocent... Once you have taken it in the turd cutter you can't label yourself innocent.
I'm the only adult here not drinking and their 2 year old daughter is trying to play dolls with me.. I've never been so demoralized in my life.
you know you're a senior when your friends are at the bar before you even get out of class
why the fuck would you go to class? it's karaoke wednesday.
You're getting spoiled, you better send me at least a side boob pic if you wanna see my dick dressed up as Davie Crockett.
Haha I'm surprised I didn't see you I was drunkenly buying $70 in merchandise including a vibrating cock ring at that cvs around that time
he made a bon jovi sex playlist and started crying when "i'll be there" came on... how was your night?
And the cockring thing wasn't sexual.
I should have made a run for it. Seriously who calls the cops on themselves and goes to jail. ...on a Monday.
Everything I own smells like cigarettes and victory right now. The smell is never coming out.
Everytime I try to keep track of the amount of people I slept with I always forget about that guy I met on the dc metro, where I woke up to him organizing his Special K and Molly and I was covered in sleeping cats.
When dressing for a 3way, how do I convey to the other chick I care enough to look pretty but not so much that it's a huge deal?
So... How much of our rent is drug money?
The fact that you got a stranger guy to buy you a pizza off tinder makes me feel amazing
I swear my vagina needs to be taken away from me when I drink.
well you're talking to a woman who had glorious sex less than 24 hrs ago so my opinion is biased.
Randomize
