My mom was talking about how protein is essential to strong bones and then I told her, I'll give you protein.
How unfortunate for your Mom.
so now that im really awake i see that my underwear are completely ripped down the side, my shorts are on backwards, i have to go get plan b....i call last night an epic fail or success depending on how catholic i am feeling
I'm surrounded by dudes and fupa's! No hot chicks...wtf!?
Medical industry, most hot chicks dont want to deal with blood + shit
i think our first tip to leave should have been when we saw the drinks were coming out of a gas can
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there were no ball for pong so he bought cat toys..... they had bells in them
i really wish i had a remote for my computer. its all the way on my bed while im across the hall puking my brains out to enya. not cool.
I knew we should have skipped class earlier, my lab partner is drunk from last night and making up his own experiments.
im drinking tequila tonight so will you babysit my bra?
I left after my shirt got dropped in the toilet thinking that there was absolutely no good that could happen the rest of the evening. I hear I was very wrong.
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He goes "sorry was at the gym. Some of us workout " and I wanted to text him back and go "well some of us do occasional drugs so we don't have to"
He asked me how france is treating me
Tell him you got so much dick you may never come back to the US. That ought to keep him away
These girls just walked into this party as reverse cowgirls... Wearing cowboy clothes all backwards
I think everyone at the office can tell I'm dehydrated
you mean still drunk
I've heard it both ways
Only in the emergency room do they shut the door when youre laughing too hard
Did you make it home alright?
No I'm sitting under a tree by a cricket. He's alone crying out for someone to Fuck him. This guy gets me.
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