remember them days when you seriously wanted your mom to marry rev run and we would always talk shit about justine?
joeyyyy why you always taken cheeseburgers from me?!?!?!
The fact that he grabbed my boob in the middle of the conversation shows something needs to change
My neighbor just watched me eat a granola bar without pants, this is a whole new level of unemployed
booty call hours are between 1:30-3:00 AM thurs-sat with the exception of major drinking holidays and election days. please try again
The timing couldn't have been better if I planned it. His mom walked away, I vomited in their mulch, and then his mom came back and offered me bread.
Pissed along side the highway while waving at all the traffic... if thats not a sign of a productive night to come then idk what is
what's the appropriate greeting for someone whose bed you've had sex with someone else in?
I come back upstairs and she's leaning over sink full of vomit saying 'oh my god it's the chili'
Katie told the cabby "when the boat docks I'm getting off with you"
So how exactly do I backtrack from motorboating and ass grabbing?
you flipped over the sheets and there was my bed. filled with ding dongs.
If you're doing something that makes your best friend lock you in a bathroom you shouldn't be doing it
Why are you hurting?
Tried to drink all the beer in Nashville last night....failed.
It's okay to admit that you're into redheads.
I just don't understand what you plan on accomplishing there except for losing all vestiges of post-freshman year dignity
Randomize
