i just made out with my boyfriends father...and so did jess
apparently you can't crawl through the drive-thru window
Some guy is walking around the bar with his dick out. Health code violation?
i knew it was time to leave the bar when i caught myself doing karate dance moves with a married man.
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She just texted me that she's horny, then started quoted random music, then telling me everything she regrets. I don't think there's enough tequila in the world for me to deal with her...
Yep. I'm going to buy a sex toy and a LARP prop on the same trip. Welcome to my life.
So the " I'm gay but curious" thing worked. You owe me 50 bucks.
I feel like someone poured gasoline and bleach in my nose and lit it on fire.
Why! I don't feel that at all!!!! I feel jipped
I wanted to get all my legit stuff out, but then I decided I didn't trust drunk me with my own things
Good decision.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Dude at one point I lost you only to find you sitting in the bushes eating pizza.
She took all the bottles out of the shower caddy and replaced them with booze. I just made a shower Manhatten. Imma marry this one.
She puked in the bed, peed in the closet, and woke up on a Rubbermaid in the closet under the stair case
It wasn't as awesome as they lead everyone to believe. No stripper. Ran out of booze. The chipmunk. He was real.
I am high. And my mom surpised me today. Now i am high and with my mom....bad idea
Just woke up to the cat unconscious on my stomach, his face between my tits, purring to bring down the walls. I'm endeared and horrified at the same time.
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