week 6 of class: i have yet to go to spanish sober. i love being THAT girl.
Who was that couple sleeping in your bed with us last night?
He would only do it doggy style. The "he's probably gay" debate rages on...
I fed him jelly beans while he fingered me. Win, win situation.
My knee is bleeding. This cheeseburger is the 3rd thing I made out with today and I think I got a job with the ducks. Catalina is poppin
My mom would probably be ok with my lifestyle as long as she doesn't see that photo of me doing bong rips in a Jesus costume.
Yes, you can 69 in a fiat. But I think I have permanent nerve damage
My night consisted of weed, sex, and Mexican food. In that order. I think we found the keys to saving our marriage.
it's like I can see my whorish nature reflected back at me in his wedding ring.
The plan is that you eat an edible first, then pressure your dad to do one. You know you are down.
Bring the pizza ill bring the boundaries we can cross
Your niece just basically announced she's a whore on FB so you should feel pretty good about officiating that wedding next month.
Up until today, I never would have thought I'd have to tell someone not to color on the cat
He's wearing my bra and eating a breadstick while jumping on our bed.....
there is a spider sitting on top of my weed like he owns it or some shit
no but seriously tf do i do? i have that spider phobia but i think my lvoe of the weed overpowers it
Randomize
