so then they started chanting "LET'S GET A LITTLE BIT SCHWASTED. S-H-W-...WASTED!" theres nothing like partying with former high school cheerleaders
jungle juice + heels + stairs = broken arm
how in the hell can u get pulled over when ur car is parked.
I hope I bought a crossbow. Also I need to not drink that much
i refuse to be around anyone not wearing a sombrero...its cinco de mayo
That's not as bad as watching a dumb ass drunk peeing into your window fan -
He said we would have a beautiful daughter together. That way too much for a one night stand...
She climbed up the stairs with three brownies in one fist, two in the other, and one in her mouth. Also, she opened the bedroom door with her foot. I may be in love.
I feel like my dick pic collection should be archived at the Smithsonian
Is a swingers hotel appropriate for an anniversary?
Do they still have sex clubs in San Francisco? Because that'd be an interesting way to spend Easter.
Went up to some dude that hit on Laura and told him he has a voice like a grandma. Apparently didnt have muscles or kindness like grandma so can you pick me up at the ER please?
Drunk is not a location!
Still, being medically ordered to stuff things in your vagina is amazing.
WELL I DIDNT KNOW IT WAS POSSIBLE TO COME SO HARD YOU HAVE AN ASTHMA ATTACK BUT HERE I AM
Randomize
