It's a miracle Ok Typing texts toYou right now
I looooooove Saturdays!!!!!!!
I am absolutely hammered
road dome is illegal, just asked in driving school.
I'm literally partying with O.J. Simpson's son right now. I don't know what to make of this.
Apparently my gaydar only works on americans. Frenchie capris has two topless chicks in our kitchen making him breakfast.
i'm not a hellocoptur, but youer in a dorm ans im un a dorm
I just want to have weird supply closet sex with him... and then I'll be all set. Fired, but all set.
Oh you have a half-brother? Why that's right up my alley! Let's cause family strife
Tearing families apart since 2011.
My mom was looking at curtains for me and sent pictures and I had to be like "not the Disney princess pink and purple, more like an acid trip"
So, this year for my birthday, want to get rip-roaring schmammered and watch my episode of my super sweet 16? We can do lines off my tiara.
Actually it's really just going to be me drunk in your living room swinging from a pole on a tuesday morning.
I let my daddy issue flag fly free last night.
You're not horrible. Thank you for my pandas.
I feel like at this point in my life I should be dating someone who doesn't run out of all his money on Mondays and have to wait til fridy to buy his weed
He was gunna drive a half hour for a makeout sesh. Time to take the diapers off and learn about the wonders of the penis, dude
Dude is PACKING. And yes I am holding up a cross and holy water and hissing like a pissed off goose.
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