just saw a prosititute with a baby stroller...question is...if the baby wakes up is the blow job free?
even the sluttiest version of myself will not go down on him
my coke dealer is running a Black Friday special
You've picked up chicks by quoting metal bands
When they're drunk they believe it's Shakespeare...enjoy the simple things
He came over while I was in the ER and hung pictures of himself around my house.
For the record it's 1026 and you told me I could leave you in the bathroom.
Am I undercharging for one hour of sex per essay? I need a serious business answer.
I'll have you know that I'm still picking duct tape residue off my wrist from sunday
He never broke character while fucking me on the neighbor's lawn. I give him a 10 for his dedication to the British accent.
Also, even though this really sucks now, we will look back on this one day and laugh at the time we all got arrested on Thanksgiving
Dicks are so weird. He has kind of a feminine comforter in the background.
I POOPED CONFETTI TOO. Ingested unacceptable amount of it oh my god can I die from this?
Blow Jobs and the Patriots Playing I think I’m going to marry her
He looks like Aladdin, and that's about all he's got going for him.
If it makes you feel any better, I can't find the goldfish I dropped like five minutes ago.
Randomize
