Do you feel that fire radiating from matt's crotch for you
Gross. gingers suck
ed mcmahon, farrah fawcett, and michael jackson all in one week. What next god, are you juts gonna take my penis too?
:)
Wipe that smile off your face.
I just found 51 cents in my bed. Did you leave me a tip?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
i deep throated a ruler to see what my limit was...
no guy is ever going to take you seriously as a potential marriage prospect unless you learn to swallow
I had to ask him for the scissors while I was in the shower. My hood piercing was stuck in my loofah.
If you're going to outback I'll have to decline, I've slept with a large enough portion of their staff already.
YOU RECOMMENDED ME TO THIS GIRL BECAUSE SHES A STRIPPER AND YOU KNOW MY WEAKNESS FOR STRIPPERS WITH CHILDREN.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
You know its good night when theres makeup smears on the toilet seat
Is it really road head if took place on kayaks in the river?
Two big black bouncers picked you up and escorted you to the elevator.
I didn't even do anything wrong. For all they knew I could have been on the US Olympic Gymnastic team. Would they kick Gabby Douglas out of a bar? I don't think so.
You were hitting on girls while wearing the banana suit. When they rejected you you yelled "I gotta split anyway."
you know you're in deep when you watch fear and loathing in las vegas and every damn scene is relatable.
Quote of the night award goes to my father "I like wearing my swim trunks around the house because they are cooler and more blousy for my balls". Yay dad
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