from now on my penis is your penis
it sounds like her vocal chords are covered in pudding and rocks. come get me.
Overheard: "his girlfriend fucks him with the lights off. It's not serious."
lmfao. well really. it's not love if you cringe at the site of his anus.
So tell me more about the cum that came out of your nose
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
my bed looks and feels like i need to buy plan b.
If i die in the snow, get to my laptop and delete all of the nickelback. password is "barry"
as in "white"?
You got off, kissed my dick and whispered "stay hard" to it, puked and then got right back on top of me like nothing happened...
There's three frat guys comparing how you were in bed. apparently you have gotten worse with time
It was awesome explaining why I had a tiger with boxers in my bed, a little bit drunk, to a girl in a pre-sex moment
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
spring break - time to see if my two week detoxing gave my liver a chance to recover.
My tuesday consisted of speaking to a federal agent for two hours and watching a roving band of gypsies jump over a fire until 2:30am
At least I remembered to wear a bra. I feel like that's a big accomplishment right now
I should probably drink beer instead of rum today so I don't end up naked in my living room while I still have guest.
I don't want to inconvenience you with my dick\n\n
I ran into the marine at the grocery store. Its like my vag and his penis have this way of finding each other when I least want it.
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