Exactly. All of us sinners go to hell and get nothing while all of the goody two shoes get to go to heaven where its all pink floyd, lasers, and pot.
Uh, also, Rob told me he felt bad for choking you.
Is it obsessive that I keep picking my crazy sex rug burn scab so it leaves a scar I can remember him by?
he/she has shaved legs and makeup on. but a spare tire stomach, high socks with high heels...a wig and glasses. and still talked like a man. it was a nightmare scenario
i dont even mind you always shaving my pubes when i pass out, i'm starting to find it liberating.
I just had a brazillian performed by a hungarian named olga. Im pretty sure she was trying to rip out my soul. You owe me a million orgasms
We fucked in my trunk while on the clock....what did you do at work today?
banged a milf last night. she left right after cause of parent teacher conferences this morning. victory.
My lunch = taste testing salsas for A&P. They gave me a free 64oz grape juice as a thank you. So, now we have something to drink in the house. So while you are spending all the money on breakfast rolls and pizza for lunch, I'm cigaretteless and whoring myself for tablespoons of salsa and free juice.
I'm ready to get married, then we can lie around watching anime and eating pizza while he rubs baby oil on me
But can mardi gras accurately capture the essence of my tiny rage?
i'm gonna crowd surf you onto his dick
He doesn't have much of a personality but he makes up for it with his sexual prowess
keeper.
If Dr Phil has taught me anything about myself, it’s that I can seriously relate to those women who fake their pregnancies.
I have betrayed my no carb ways & I can feel it.
Embrace it. Come over to the dark side. I'll feed you muffins while stroking your hair.
Randomize
