She was lying the whole time!
She was a great actress
I was a great dumbass
Why do all fat girls have "that smell"?
Espresso. Can't sleep. Love puppies
We are not turning the camelbak into a beer bong
Just fucking put out. It'll be a good lay, promise. Stop being a prude. Damn it. A boy is trying to put his penis in you. APPRECIATE IT.
He was more tolerable with alcohol in my system. I woke up to him squeezing me and telling me how he wanted to dip me in strawberry jam.
I'm still drunk. it's summer. I just need a hot dog and an aspirin.
There are twenty thousand men on this campus, please have sex with someone who isn't my drug dealer
The guy I'm talking to drunk texted me his essay last night and he asked me to revise it
You'd be proud. Took my birth control today at 12:30 with a Budweiser. Guy across the bar saw and held his bottle up to salute me 😂
My mind doesn't wanna day drink but my heart does.
I just want to sit in my tub, drugged out of my mind, and watch the green lantern cartoon while the world as we know it ceases to exist outside my bathroom door, Okay? Is that REALLY too much to ask?
I hate him but I love him for what he does which is me
someone just "made it rain" kraft processed sliced cheese. i forgot what it was like to be home...
Tell me you're alive little brother. And please tell me you didn't get arrested. You made no fucking sense last night in your random texts and pictures you were sending me.
Randomize
