so when i dont talk to her she talks to herself...idk whats worse
is there a reason why there is cup of piss in the fridge?
no
you kept naming everything at the party...like "boy i'm going to make out with" and "table i'm going to dance on later"
its like national bring your ginger to the pool day or something
i promise ill be ok...btw im only considered "not ok" if i end up in the hospital.
they would be such cute babies and they would grow up to have huge dicks. and that would make me proud as a mother
Claiming territory at this party means signing a girls ass...I've got dibs on a blonde
Just realized that St. Patty's is on a Saturday this year in case you were interested in coming to New York and redefining bender with me.
Apparently I'm short enough to sit on his lap and fuck him while he is driving because the cop didn't notice.
I'M MAKING HIKING PLANS WITH THE GIRL WHO IS DATING MY EX, THAT IS PERSONAL FUCKING GROWTH
drunk brunch me or lose me forever
i think my cat just said my name.
Please tell your friend to stop shitting in my closet.
I have to sleep with him. We're too much alike. It's like clash of the titans, except instead of clashing, he's putting it in me.
Why did two squirrels just run out from behind the couch?
About that.
Randomize
