Barsexuality is the new black.
is it gross that my labia hangs so much that guys can't find my clit?
I'm at a Rock of Love themed party. New high? New low? I can't tell.
Wait. Scratch that. It's not themed. These girls are just sluts.
I just past a guy who was biking and double fisting wit glass beer bottles. That is what i call talent
i think its awesome that according to your mom i'm your friend that caught on fire.
The fact that I am sitting home writing a resume while you're out inducing vomiting makes me feel like way more of an adult than I'm ready to be.
Yeah. I stopped her before she flashed the guy for a free slice of pizza. She called me a gentleman and then before I knew it she was in my bed.
Their was just 7 people standing outside eating a costco chicken, definitley at the right party
why the fuck are my pubes caked with bread crumbs?
Did I seriously kick a door down last night... And if so when where and how hard, cause that shit I do not recall.
Do you have any puffy paint? I want to put "fiesta muthafuckas" on my sombrero but its too much to bedazzle.
It takes a special friend to go vibrator shopping with
Yes. It does.
How did it feel to just observe all the people blacking out usually you're on the other end of things
I felt like I was at the zoo
Okay, so is being determined to have my vagina licked by a woman on Valentine's day an acceptable goal?
I smell like cotton candy and guilt.
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