Sponge bath it is.
Please dont use Danity Kane lyrics to describe your emotions.
She threw her promise ring on the ground, that's when the freak came out.
Well if were past the bullshitting stage yes if not then no I'm not that kind of guy
He changed his profile picture to him as a baby. Definitely a turn off. This will help in my "don't-be-a-slut-endeavors"
Just smokin in the creek with some deer, they like the smoke, I know.
My masturbation fantasy just had a wedding theme. I need new hobbies.
In other news, last night I told somebody they made eczema look so good they should call it sexzema.
Blocking me on Facebook doesn't change the fact that you've had my penis in my mouth. So there's that.
this is a preemptive text before you call me freaking out: i have your keys and your car is parked safely a block down from your apartment.
you are a goddess
So high I legit spent 20mins in the shower just holding my tits cuz they feel bigger than normal.
Man, it's really obvious that I was either handcuffed or tied up last night. Either way, not something you'd want coworkers knowing.
is it bad that I'm more worried about having to take out my piercings than the fact that I might be having a kid
At 10 PM you were shit faced in the kitchen makin nachos... Naked. I wasn't sure what to do besides walk away...
Well she's 'call Wayne Gretzky a whore' drunk so you tell me.
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