I woke up face down on my laptop with three windows open: itunes, chat roulette and redtube
woke up with withdrawal cold sweats this morning. spring break must really be over.
Training to be a housewife: cleaning the house and masturbating while cookies are in the oven.
After we smoked, the cops questioned us but i just asked if he wanted to join our basketball team.
You were yelling at the bowl of salad and telling it to quit taunting you and telling you to go to tacobell
Jim came in did 3 body shots of her she said "I like your tongue" and they left. I swear to god its deja vu he's done it before
youre always welcome to strip dance on tables with me Mag. what are friends for.
I'm texting you the word "cockring" because I feel it hasn't been said enough throughout our friendship.
Boise Idaho, where you have a one night stand with someone from your town 3 states away and run into them the day you return...
I remember saying to him "Fun fact! If you lie this way it's easier to deep throat!" I even judge me.
I'm not gay but if a lesbian wants to eat my box out I'm not gonna say no to someone who knows what they're doing.
His name is Angel. I'm pretty sure he was sent from heaven solely to eat me out.
wasn't that the evening we made out with the girls from the dental school, drank 3000 beers, almost had to beat up a guy at the strip club and James nailed some hot piece of tail and took her OSU windbreaker, which my dad went on to wear multiple times after finding it in the garage.
Yes. To all of that. Yes.
she is currently in the shower drinking a beer and dancing to a song called "the penis song" my roommate is cooler than yours
I can still taste your cum in my mouth and my in-laws are coming over. This should go well.
Randomize
