don't you miss dr. quinn: medicine woman? i do.
a lady just got escorted out of the bar because she came in carrying a can of gasoline while smoking a cigarette....this place is the definition of class
OMG. if college stays like this, theres no way i wont be pregnant by first semester
Ill trade u your bra for a run to the liquor store...
But today feels so special with katie getting herpes and me cleaning my room. Good things are happening.
Well im sitting on a futon on a porch at 1:30 in the afternoon drinking boxed wine out of a pint glass next to a chick with a homemade neckbrace. What do you think?
The best part of my day was getting high in the parking lot of the movie theater and taking pics in the photo booth with the caption "CONGRATULATIONS!" we geeked out because it congratulated us for getting high
You're not on my level until you shop at Petsmart for sex accessories.
it's just weird to think of you as a teacher since ive seen you throw up raspberry bacardi in my parents house
I remember you fighting a small man for the last of the pizza. Was there a midget in my house last night?
Discovery: there is a folder in my pictures labeled "Your Name and cats"
And on the first day of my adult job, I matched with one of my co workers on tinder...
a guy offered me a piece of pizza if I'd make out with a random girl. We got the whole damn box and I ain't even mad
I'm sorry but if you can talk well enough to critique his oral game, he clearly needs the pointers.
Putting plan B on my parents credit card wasn't the smartest idea
Randomize
