she said she could "feel the heat of my groin" against her. ruined the whole fucking moment.
Just saw someone buying TWO six packs of O'Doul's. WHY ??
she said "feliz nobby job" then proceeded to give me a blowjob.
Sorry, can't come over. I have to spend time with my niece. Her Dad ignores her and I don't want her to have male attention issues like you.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
yeah, that's what i said too. right before i tackled that street sign.
I have been sober for so long that I miss hangovers... what is happening to this summer?
I WALKED myself out of breath. And I'm lost I'm a Tim Hortons parking lot. That's how hungover I am.
I tell myself every day I shouldn't be friends with you
He texted back and said he would hook up if he didn't have a test at 8am. It's really hard to be annoyed by how good of a student he is.
Yeah that sucks. That's why I stick to deadbeat sports management majors.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'm convinced my penis is the only thing holding this relationship together.
I tried to stop that, but then I pulled the leaves out of my panties and went to sleep.
Dude I am allergic to the candy dicks from that sex shop in Vegas. Come take me to hospital right now.
I did get to watch you pee, tho. That counts as another precious moment.
Do you think it would be weird to wear a shirt that says 'big fun small package' from an ex for a first date?
There is no way entering a gas station bathroom memorializing an alien abduction in rural New Hampshire is a good idea.
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