We're facebook friends in real life
these burps are starting to have way more vomit in them,
Take xtc, wait 20 minutes and then take a shower. Trust me.
No I am not eating basil off your cock
Apparently william has a "couch montage"...an album of facebook photos of himself on different couches in various states of happiness and despair. A heartwrenching journey through what was clearly a significant part of his life. I'd mock him more but I think the fact that I looked through it means he's already won
The girl that works the front desk at my gym invited me and my friend to come see her Tuesday during her shift at hooters because its her birthday. I still have a boner
She's cute. And her snoring noises remind me of the incidental music from Jaws.
It's gonna be ok. As we grow older we sometimes lose sight of what's important to us. Like safe sex. And standards.
It's disgusting. He breathes through his mouth and just sounds fat. Plus he chews all loud and shit.
2013: the year of legs covered in hair and pregnancy scares.
Gays age differently than straights. 29 is like 45 in gay years. Next year I'll be in adult diapers and applying for medicaid.
I'm gonna eat you out. But for science
The police report said i was screaming at someone that wasnt there, then the cops told me to call someone sober and i called mike to tell him "They are trying to arrest me for stealing information from the FBI" at that point they took me to jail.
The worst part is there are all kinds of happy creatures out here like fucking snow white and i'm sitting in semi-dead grass, hungover with a burnt butt
No idea who's grandma but people were just running around naked
Randomize
