I just wanted to draw pictures of limp wieners on peoples doors and smash pictures of palm trees. That's it.
Don't go all Obama on me. George Bush this decision and just do it. Thinking's for the morning after
Breakfast is bomb, yo. McDonald's before ten thirty is like Katie Holmes before Tom Cruise.
I love my penis, it thinks for me sometimes
So how do we make 4/20 better than every other day we are stoned?
THE MIME IS MIMING TO BUST A MOVE KARAOKE. ALL MIME-RELATED EVENTS DESERVE CAPS LOCK
I wish you could see how much hot sauce and broken glass are in our apartment right now.
I figure hes like disneyworld. You know youre only going once or twice in life. Might as well have fun and ride the rides
Also while I am being the bigger person I plan on bringing over something strong smelling and/or alcoholic to torture the poor hungover bastard
The to do list extremely baked self wrote for me last night says "1. Join gym 2. Passport? 3. Join a gym" And then just a drawing of a squid
A BJ like that needs to be recommended.
My signature move is making guys wonder why they bothered in the first place
I can't believe you won 5 grand from the casio last night and spent more than 80% on tacobell and strippers already
Who died my cat blue again?
Lmao. K I'll be 100% honest. I was over at your place like 12 hours ago with your roommate. If I hadn't of been there then I'd take you up on your booty call offer. So. If you're not creeped out another time please?
Randomize
