weak ass sauce last night. waste of time. you suck. ps. your boobs are fake
at a bonfire and someone threw a plastic cup in the fire. everyone immediately stopped what they were doing to yell collectively at him about what he was doing to the environment, then went back to drinking
only in oregon
She just did a myspace photoshoot with her baby
i told the bartender last night that if the palace saloon made a calendar he would be every month.
so i used to love airports for the escalators... now its the bars... then the escalators after the bars
Interesting preview of what next year will be like. Side note, missing a chunk of flesh from my middle finger.
Not going out tonight. And so the 25 day drinking streak ends....
I find it worrying that she bit me in bed. Then proceeded to write her name in bite marks. All without ever losing the rhythm of our fucking.
So immediately after we finished having sex she started singing, "The Circle of Life", put her clothes on and then just left. I think I'm in love.
My only regret this past weekend is abusing only 3 substances when I could have done so much more.
This is the worst drive ever. Im hungry, hungover, i gotta shit so bad, and the only radio station im getting clearly is playing alvin and the chipmunks christmas songs
Well when we Get drunk it gets rowdy. We could always attempt self-control. But historically and statistically speaking, we fail at that.
I really wanted you to make me eggs this afternoon. I even wrote it on my hand to remind myself.
Met the hot new neighbor. She's into country music and giving really good bjs. Latter made up for the former.
How does it make you feel that I can't control my vagina around you?
Randomize
