i can't believe i never thought of this: farticle man
chinese tourists just took a picture of me....im pretty sure i heard the bus drive say something about shame.
they were having sex on the toilet apparently and everytime someone knocked they flushed. it was like an auditory scoreboard of sex duration.
I just gagged from thinking about the amount of tequila we will be drinking. DRUNK TUESDAYS
My life is over. I farted in open court. Noticeably. The judge looked at me. It echoed.
Just took a piss in some random bushes in a traffic jam and had to sprint back to the car. I'm a boss.
You've never sent a girl a dick pic?
Call me old fashioned
His flight is delayed. Mother Nature is delaying me from sex.
I snapchatted him nudes and he didn't screenshot a single one of them because he's a gentleman.
I told her I had a small penis. Then replied if Peter Pan won with a dagger then so can I
Remember when I made out with that stranger at the bar on my 21 in chicago? I wonder how he's doing
We almost drove away from the bar with a British stranger in our trunk...
I think the pizza guy was in shock..
Well I didn't mean to answer the door only in socks but I mean come on, 4 hours of sex works up an appetite! I WAS RAVENOUS
I just called my grandma crying, apologizing for being the first grandchild to have premarital sex...I'm either about to start my period or pregnant.
Will exercising make me less horny?
Randomize
