Fake titties should be able inflate and deflate like tires. So on Saturday you can put on your Double D hooker titties or Sunday put on your size B church tits.
i want to have as much fun as i did last weekend. but plus the condom and minus the fear.
Ate pizza for the 3rd time today, can't decide if that's disgusting or an amazing aspect of American culture.
I'm like 99% sure I made out with Kevin Spacey last night. Not good.
what is with people arguing over soda or pop? to be honest i thought it was just called chaser
please dont tell anyone i was drunk
you were publicly making out with a very old very spandex covered woman...they know
It was everywhere, it looked like he just took the leftovers and threw them around the bathroom... Festively...
He was singing Justin Beiber while we did it. I love secure Spanish men
"You can go raw dog up in me". Exact words. I can't decide whether to run, or fuck. Help.
Now that I've quit blow, I think I'm allergic to my cat....
My girlfriend is talking to my ex-boyfriend at the bar right now. I REPEAT, GIRLFRIEND IS TALKING TO EX BOYFRIEND RIGHT NOW. GET ME THE FUCK OUT OF THIS PLAACE
im looking at the positives. number one it stopped me from hooking up with vince infront of his girl, number two it gave me something to do instead of throwing up and number three i fuckin rocked his world
Did we kick in my basement door last night?
Yes. I think you actually bought tennis shoes specifically for that application.
Upstairs definitely just had sex while I wrote you love poetry. That was a fun experience 🤷🏻♀️
I have a number of responses, ranging in content, tone, and maturity. Choose your destiny...
I CAN’T BELIEVE YOU STUCK YOUR DICK IN CRAZY!
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