No, you can still breathe under the balls.
He smothers me through text. I can't even image what he'd be like in person.
After all you put him through, I think it was only right that you saluted the bartender when you left.
His car is carseat is compatible. I checked while we were banging in the back seat...
the campus cop used the word depravity in our citation.
I just found a 2 minute video on my phone of you throwing up in a fake plant.
I was cracked out naked on a toilet pretending I was posing for playboy.. Shit got weird, but apparently I had a good bday.
I have a bruise on dick where you tried to "high five" me.
Yeah then she waddled like a duck in silence sat down and ate the entire paper towel roll.
Um, you were throwing up the shocker symbol in front of all of the wedding guests during the best man's speech. No wonder the groom thinks we're bad
I need two food groups: booze and turkey sandwiches
I'm glad you found someone that both loves you and is cool doing coke off your tits. Proud of you.
I have got to stop telling people I was almost a prositute every time I drink
Did I tell you he put a lobster carcass on his dick?
Im drinking a CAN of bud light at the bar. Do you really think I care anymore?
Randomize