Someone's playing Limp Bizkit out loud on the train. I think the decade reset it self.
dude,it's memorial day.not getting wasted=you're a terrorist
He thought I was flirting with him but really I just needed someone to hold me up.
So I saw the nuva ring just lying on the counter at Planned Parenthood...did u know it's just a ring? I could go to the Dollar tree buy a plastic bracelet and shove it up there instead.
You do that. Then go have lots of unprotected with your harem of booty calls and see how that works out for you.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Girl, that was the lost night of 2012 for me and I have buried that night deep deep away..
Trying to figure out if the guy I'm with right now is the same guy I met spring break
Oh duude it is the guy from spring break! Awk.
So you're saying you don't want to be with her anymore because she likes sex to much and is just to hot?
Well when you say it that way it makes me sound like an idiot.
You are an idiot.
I feel like a drive thru vagina
I need a moral compass that doesn't always point to dick
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
you never un-have a 4some
I don't wanna shit myself again in 2015
I just fell and sprained my ankle in the shower. No, I wasn't having sex. I was doing the time warp. Again.
Ate his Chinese food and drank his beer and played with his chihuahua. All while wrapped in a towel while he was sleep.
I promised her before I left that I'd make good choices and then got drunk and fucked my best friend and her boyfriend.
I mean, if I asked you, would you cum on cotton candy for me?
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