I am puke
So I just had this crazy idea, and no it has nothing to do with the fact that they made me take shots at work.
that coffee was exactly what I needed. Also whose awesome hat is on the couch with ear flaps? I wanna put my head in it
Smoking bowl and applying to community college. I now know how I got here.
I just got a high school volleyball teams practice cancelled because I slept with the head coach through their practice time.
and then he put stevie wonder on to fuck to...and hummed along as I blew him
they're both coked to the gills having a shouting match about the powers and abilities of godzilla. and using the wikipedia entry on the topic to support their respective arguments.
I only get commercials for vodka and Rogaine now. You're exactly right, Hulu. That's exactly right.
I tried to lock you in the bathroom stall because you were too drunk. But you escaped from underneath, I gave up
U were yelling that I wasn't generous or supportive. Then you kneeled and said this weird prayer about the windows and doors of your life.
I was trying to get everyone to go to the bar but I puked on my hands, so nobody took me seriously.
You keep talking about hotdogs and yelling "COME ON DOWN, LET ME SEE WHAT YOU'RE WEARING"
DUDE I FINGERED JOE'S MOM, PLS DONT TELL HIM, MORE LATER
He can't say no, it's my spiritual goddamn quest.
Oh man. I threw up in the first cab. Got kicked out. Roamed somewhere for awhile. Fell asleep in the back if the second cab. Woke up in my underwear on the living room floor with a frozen pizza (thawed) laying next to me
Randomize
