but, i was nude. you really should respect my stupidity and delete them. please.
if you call bong hits and onion rings a party, then yeah
Do you ever make guys send you dick pictures just cause it's hilarious?
He had an itunes playlist named "def not Glee season 1" which contained all of Glee season 1
Tonight we are playing Scuba-Keg. Getting keg now. I'll explain when i get home.
You unbuttoned your shirt and started walking down the center of the road screaming traffic stops for Enrique Iglesias.
Just rolled over and found your boyfriend in bed with me. Is mine at your house?
they just started filling water ballons with vodka.
on my way.
I need to find my pants, a way out of here, and a cheeseburger.
I sent her a picture of Richard Nixon and said "these are the only dick pics I send".
you just won the triple crown of sex! your prize is more sex.
I'm kinda sad I'm leaving the bank. I never got to have rough sex in the vault.
Can't tell if it's the drugs or science magic, but I *THINK* that mouse just turned into a squirrel.
Umm...sounds like a maybe. I broke my nose and have surgery next wed but if I'm ok by Friday I'm down.
It's not even a normal fucking affair I've found myself in. It's a fucking bdsm clusterfuck.
Randomize
