You screamed for campus security to do something about the police officer who dumping ur 40
Am I undercharging for one hour of sex per essay? I need a serious business answer.
Stripper pole. Sore legs. More vaca money.
Dude i don't know we had to beg the bouncer to let us in because you were bleeding everywhere and he saw you run into a dumpster
but I'll probably watch some porn later so it's not a complete waste of a Saturday night.
Can't decide if this guy is hot or if I'm just bored.
Sex is clearly the solution either way.
I told him the only reason I'd sleep with him is if we have a threesome because I'll need moral support
So is that the only criterion for shenanigans now? Don't die?
Brought some lesbians back to the light side of the force
I'm tired, but I'm gonna go with "I watched the debate last night and part of my soul died"
It finally happened. Some guy just tried to catfish me with my own dick pic. Of course I told him that it was the hottest dick I'd ever seen and that I would do anything for that particular dick.
If you get banged by this bartender you know you can't be mad at me right? Its the rules.
You're lucky I'm holding your vagina in my best interests
Do you think he’ll fall in love with me if I tell him I have a nickname for his penis
I learned tonight while in another country that no matter the nationality, men are disappointing in bed
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