Good face, no body. And apparently her vagina is related to chewbaca.
IT'S FRIDAY. So quit being a pussy, get out of bed, and come help me drink these 40s. That's not a request.
My walk of shame was far more interesting today. He's moving and was cleaning out his apartment, so not only was I carrying my clothes, I also walked away with 4 bottles of cheap wine and a jar of ragu.
i convinced her i need a blow job every morning to wake up because i have a medical condition.
You had us pull over so you could pee, you proceeded to pee in some random persons front yard while yelling "im not ashamed"
Im tired as fuck but i cant leave him here like this i gave him the acid and i feel the responsibillity to put his mind back together its fun im an architect about to about to construct a whole new belief and moral system inside this soul. Talk about the best psychothearpy
This is the point in ur life where u should realize there's nothing left but a spiral of shame
I should but I don't. All I see is an escalator of success
He was wearing a tux and a big sombrero so it automatically made the flute he was playing totally cool
she pretty much pinned my hand to her boob "on accident" for like 10 seconds before she moved. Waiting the rest of the night was just a formality.
Why do you hate her?
She's dating the best penis that has ever entered my vagina.....
It would be awesome if I knew whose teeth these were in my pocket
They came over the loud speaker and said "no laying on the dance floor.." I thought i was dancing, but apparently that's just the way it started out.
I'm pretty sure NORMAL roommates don't have to hide each others sex toys from their fuck buddies.
how much boxed wine can one drink before work in a couple of hours?
Who brings nunchucks to a funeral?
Randomize
