So his roomate was eating breakfast when I was sneaking out. He's the guy I took home from jessicas wedding. I ended up eating coco puffs with him
Just another sign I need to get out of this town
We discussed how the marijuana was making the dopamine float around our nucleus accumbens last night when we were high. Yet another example of how our science classes are perverting our good times.
he picked an earring up off the bar floor and tried to give it to girls as a present.
We were debating whether rain water is clean enough to drink. I won when he started throwing up.
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But the ghost of his schlong past haunts you
Hey, it's Thrasher! From the hospital!
And I really REALLY don't feel like cleaning cinnamon off my penis tonight.
I got a blowjob dressed with a t shirt sweatpants and a Fanny pack. Not kidding.
Something bad happened. I'm just giving you some notice. So you can smoke some pot and hide all sharp items in the house.
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Just want to let you know thanks for setting the bar pretty low when it comes to girls.
One singular head for man, one giant climax for mankind
I AM GONNA CUM EVERYWHERE TONIGHT BRO.
I'm telling you, I 'm beginning to think that my vagina is magical.
Auto correct isn't even working for how drunk you are
I woke up wearing mittens dude
I woke up in my bathtub with the potted plant from downstairs.
checkmate.
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