So random guy from last night came over tonight. I told myself I wasn't going to sleep with him but he had some killer dirty talk and a big penis in his arsenal...what was I supposed to do? Supposedly he lost his virginity to his wife and since their divorce a year ago I'm the 1st girl he's slept with, I feel like I just re-took his virginity...I feel like a rockstar.
I just chased the everclear with Listerine...I think I found my new chaser!
I just threw up during my phone interview for the largest PR firm in the world.
It was worse than when we pepper-sprayed my dick. I feel mislead.
And then he posed under the bed and said, "you should draw me like one of your french girls." Why do they keep giving this kid drugs?
Nope. Too hot. We just sat in my tub with cold water spraying on us drinking coronas. This summer heat is killing my libido slowly
Im going..... Drinking all day and hand jobs from 18yr old emo rich girls that are just trying to get back at mom and dad for being to protective...SOLD
I made him an O's fan. One pic of my tits coming out of a Baltimore shirt and it was done.
Don't talk to me about scholarly dedication until you've taken a final in boxers, a bloody tank top and a zip tie to hold your hair back. I wear the most sullied 4.0 crown of all time....
bullshit you weren't drunk, you pointed at me and said my cigarette was empty
Just walked in and got handed a drink. Good service
CODE RED CODE RED MY VIBRATOR IS BROKEN THIS IS NOT A DRILL
Currently looking up Winnie-the-Pooh porn.
I think I was judged by a squirrel this morning during the walk...
Sitting on couch, workout sex makes me more sore than regular workout
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