i hate sounding clingy, but i just wanted to verify i wasn't an asshole in your mind
i just thanked the atm machine for giving me cash
so i'm sitting in his room drinking tequila from the bottle and watching harry potter. he's jacking off to some porn a couple feet away from me. at one point i look over and see that he's watching me instead of the porn. please help me figure out how warped it is that i found that romantic
Is it because I queefed?
Hey its the Filipino guy from last night. I just wanted to say sorry my friend bled all over your driveway. Great party though.
i told you the emergency thong was a good idea.
Saw the college gyno today. It has now been medically confirmed that I have a perfect vagina.
Apparently she got a minor consumption for using vodka soak tapmons
Does that work!! Please say yes
Dear, was it your thong we found wrapped around my hairbrush next to Rachel's bed? Please explain.
It'll just be like "PENIS HERE". In case you get lost.
Would you like season tickets to my vagina?
GOOD NEWS I CAN BRING THE VODKA IN MY LUGGAGE
this potential sugar daddy just sent me a photo of him butt naked in the woods saying he wants to "grow our spirits together." so i think i found us a new drug dealer!
this periodpocalypse needs to be over. I need head
ugh i want to get waxed but I’m afraid. my vagina has had enough trauma this week, i don’t know if I can put her thru any more.
Randomize