'hiiiigh' is saved in my t9 for a reason
I am at The Loft in SoNo, and there are two girls within arms reach that are making out with each other AGGRESIVELY. Like I can see 100% of a boob
For future reference, this is Trevors little sisters phone now. Trevs number is 484 XXX XXXX. Great story tho
you were smoking 3 cigarettes at once saying 'cancer isn't real! Its all in your head!'
We drove past his house blaring "Like a virgin" in the middle of the day. pretty sure he heard.
From the trajectory of the puke, I must have fallen off the top bunk while trying to vomit, due to the dented bucket, ruined carpet, and bruised dignity I now own.
He came over while I was in the ER and hung pictures of himself around my house.
I wouldn't take my shot so you poured it on my face. Twice.
The bar owner gave me permission to push people into the pool. I'm never going to leave Los Angeles
We broke into the space center. If i go to jail I wanted to tell you, you have a fantastic dick. Use it wisely.
Were you rubbing your penis on me while I slept? I smell like penis.
Day drinking straight vodka out of a Mountain Dew can being towed behind a kayak on a raft. And no, there is no time difference, it really is 10 am.
I also woke up in a guys bed in a Reptar shirt yesterday morning staring at a movie theater sized poster of the not as popular Air Bud franchise movie Super Buddies.
There's a 50-50 shot that I will wake up with an ass tattoo tomorrow.
Like sorry your dick won’t suck itself?
Lol. I liked you the most when we were banging random girls and trying to tag team everything. You were happier then.
Randomize
