I may or may not be laying in bed naked watching The Nanny. Niles is so spunky.
so i'm just gonna leave my credit card in your mailbox so you can bail me outta jail.. deal?
yeah he didnt know till after their one year. You have no idea how bad i wanna say "dude i sucked on those boobs before you"
The freshman next to me just said "I was rocking out on my way here to Dave Matthews..." I wish I would have passed this class the first time.
I just don't understand how a line to ride a camel on a college campus could be too long for you to wait in.
I've already started drinking so the earlier you get out of class the more coherent I'll probably be.
I will fuck him senseless, no need for a priest.
I only have one eye to read your texts because I just stabbed one out after reading that last text.
You fed me pizza off a sword last night.
Bottom line; if I'm coming out of my bat cave to do the dishes and get a chicken wing and I have no pants or makeup on and my messy bun looks more like Santa got leprosy and crashed his sled into the back of my head then let me be. That's all I'm saying.
Your vagina is not a steamboat from the 1800's
so after 3 days of looking i found the keg...looks like somebody tried burying behind the garage
Sorry for prompting a philosophical penis discussion at 10:45 on a Friday night.
If sleeping with your boss doesnt scream job security i dont know what does.
Oh and sorry for almost killing all of us last night... twice...
there is another microwave in the elevator.
Randomize
