What did I say to him last night?
Something along the lines of "your not here, I'm going to fuck sam. call me later babe, this won't take long, love you"
all in all not a bad night
Some guy with no shirt on and his pants undone informed us he was kicked out of the cab
I asked him why, and he had absolutely no idea.
just woke up with an anonymous loaf of bred in my bed and a piece in my mouth. this says alot about my life.
It could have went better. They kicked us out of the casino and I drunkenly whipped her across the face with a fishing pole. Long story.
Mandatory 420 Adventure Time.
This is why we're friends.
I think now I understand why people say my penis is pretty.
I don't remember... but I heard a cop threatened to pepper spay my dick
Honestly it's a super power. I can try it a million different ways and nothing happens. Donnie casually says "ok this is now a toppless party" and it all kicks-off
Well, it's a fine line between people-watching and boob-staring. It's a gray area. But we're in Paris. Let's leave it at that.
Ran out of deodorant. Febreze on a paper towel? Kicking college's ass.
I've decided that it's a bad thing. But I've also decided that I don't give a fuck.
This little girl and her dad are walking behind me. "Why is he wearing pajamas?" Mind your own business, kid.
I believe in your delicious
I'm about to go get lunchables and alcohol. Take that adulthood
I promise it wsnt a penis when i put it in my mouth
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