U dropped me off n it hit me, i made it inside for exactly shit thirty on the nose, another minute n i would of had brown trowsers
Yeah, that's not really a good thing. Especially for a girl. You should get a tattoo on your stomach that says "Please wear a condom".
Oh please. You given/recieved a handjob out in public. I think that shy ship has sailed.
he got a charlie horse midthrust which triggered my orgasm we're still sorting this out.
im hiding in a corner. drunk. with a plate of stolen jello shots. im pretty sure people are looking for me or the jello shots.
Wtf. I just got invited to a threeway bj session in the bathroom at boiler. Lmao
I still think the kiddie pool full of jello option is worth exploring. Just sayin'.
When you turn your data bak on you're gonna get a pic of a nipple but it's not mine
As I was about to go to sleep he asked me if I was ready to 69. HOW AM I SUPPOSED TO LOOK AT HIM IN THE FACE OVER DINNER TOMORROW
I'm going to start referring to my liver is Livy. I feel like if I give it an affectionate nickname it will hate me less. Livy isn't ready for syllabus week.
I think we all know your liver needs a man's name.
Strange request but for my birthday you should get me one of those vibrators that you can plug into your iPod that go along with the music.
I want to go to a gay rodeo for my cross country road trip. It'll be like my very own homo country boy pilgrimage to the holy land.
It's whatever. Titanic is about to be on and we have wine, which is basically crying juice. Leo, Kate, and I will be having a lovely, pants free evening.
He told me I'm a small core of pure evil wrapped up in sweetness, gold, and puppies. He gets me.
That is beautiful
Remember that time I came to London for 4 hours, got hammered, cried for an hour and then left.
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