the liability waiver did not state that i couldn't bring my bottle of wine in the bouncy castle. it did Not.
I wanna be on tlc
Impossible. You are neither fat, fertile or fashionless.
The words "my birth control fell out" should never be spoken
I'll make a Jello mold of your face so everyone can get drunk off your face
He is making me drink his THC water out of a milk jug.
Dude so coolest charity idea ever, think aids walk but instead of miles you drink beers oh the possibilities
Maybe we should invest in one and when one of us wishes to be a hot mess in a wheel chair the other one will push the mess around to wherever it wants to go.
Typing up notes at the bar and doing shots with the bartender until close on a Wednesday. This is what my second year of law school has become.
I went full Overly Attached Girlfriend. You never go full OAG.
So Doritos and vodka was obviously not as good an idea as I thought at the time.
After we won I just ran all over campus for a couple hours. Then made out with a guy on a bench
OMG I COULD FUCK HIM FOR POT, THIS CHANGES THE WHOLE GAME.
Taco Bell is giving high school kids free tacos STEAL YOUR BROTHER'S WALLET I'LL BRING THE WEED.
I'm not wearing pants, but I'm wearing a tiara.
I hope you have your own chainsaw cause I didn’t buy one for you. It was a gross oversight on my part
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