You feel like going out tonight?
Does a 14yr-old girl look good beat up? I'll bring the handle
he wasnt into me til he saw how good i was at ms pacman. wtf why does this always happen? when she kisses pacman it was a little awkward, so i made my move. i went for more than one kind of banana last night!
I'm drinking in the hospital parking lot.
I'm going to pre plan my black out tonight. I think I'll set a change of clothes out on my bed and unplug the oven.
She was indeed spoonfeeding you potato salad out of that giant bowl with a giant spoon. Dont feel special, she was giving it to everyone that left the bar.
My 16 year old neighbor is throwing a rager cuz her parents are out of town and my brother and I are sitting on the porch listening to A) someone fuck on the trampoline B) a girl bawling about her parents finding out C) someone puking in what we think is the hot tub. And overall we take a shot everytime someone says "bra"
I only know two things that kitchen floors are good for... sex and quesadillas that got dropped. You know, the five second rule
Hungover. Have to fix everything I've broken. I'm gonna be very late.
She licked my face when I was on the phone with a customer and I just laughed. Im not sure if thats good or bad
He dislocated his shoulder trying to finger me last night if that tells you anything
Come over. I have beer, your weird ass vegan pizza, and a raging hard on.
Marry me.
we turned the lights off and all you could see were my glow in the dark stars and his penis
i just remember that i was on top of him and he wasnt contributing to the event much.. god i hope he wasnt asleap.
Anytime you wish.we are doing double shots in the kitchen,and I drank a beer in the shower,so...the sooner you get here,the sooner you can get on our level.
I love random hookups in covid sex. Usually girls think me about a one and a half to a two and a half but now that I got this mask on I'm a Solid 6.
Randomize
